I’m glad you are so candid about your health. It makes it easy to ask questions that I might not ask others.

So this is my question for today. People say the dumbest things or they don’t say anything. What are some examples of things that others have said that you thought were really good comments. That made you feel like they cared even if they didn’t fully understand. That would be really helpful to me!!”

This was an email I received from a friend after reading my latest blog. The first thing I thought (and responded to him) was the feedback I get after someone reads my blog. It makes me feel that they want to know or understand just a little bit.

I cannot think of a specific statement that has been made. I was at my girlfriends the other day and our kids were playing. She read my blog and couldn’t believe some of the stupid things people say to me. Just her talking openly with me, asking me questions and really listening to the answer, that was awesome. She, like most people (and it isn’t necessarily wrong, we all do) get caught up in their own everyday life and struggles. So when they do get to be with or talk to their friends with invisible chronic diseases, it isn’t always right in their face so to speak. So when she realized my struggles were no small task, she really was interested. THAT makes me feel like she cared.

So it seems, the more I think on it, that actions really do speak louder than words. Unless those words are, well, stupid. (I usually forbid the words stupid, dumb, and hate in my house). It is more obvious when someone says something without thinking that downplays what I go thru. It is still nice to have people ask how I am, and I know full well I am not going to go into great detail. I usually answer and gauge on my “normal” and use that as my base for my answer. Now seeing those who ask and listen, those actions can show more that they care, that I matter and am not so alone.

I hope this helped some my friend. And thanks for asking!!!